wordsimageslife
an exploration of life as a parent & designer

The Weekend Comes to an End

As usual, for the this week, I'm a little on the exhausted side, so please excuse me if this post is short and not all that informative.

The party was a smashing success even though we bought way more stuff, then we actually needed. This is actually a good thing because it means we won't have to buy any alcohol for next week's camping trip (staying in cabins with some friends at a Harringon Manor State Park in the Western section of Maryland, near a nice ski resort. Hey, I know this is strange but I really want to make sure I post this on Feb. 29, no chance of that for another four years, so I'll be back on March 1. Please be patient.

Denial, a poem

Most of you know that my father is dying, and for the first time in many, many years I felt like writing a poem. Now I used to write poetry a lot but not knowing the rules of poetry writing, I never made it a career or anything. Anyhow, this morning, after the sun up I decided to write a poem about my Dad and how I'm handling it. Or not. So, this is my blog, my space and you can read it, ignore it, or just say nice job. Doesn't matter. Here it is.

Denial

I know that your are dying, yet I haven't shed a tear
Except, of course, at the end of Big Fish
And then I sobbed for a minute,
Picked myself up off the floor
And went to dinner

I don't talk about it
When the news is good, you are alive
I don't worry and it's out of my mind
When the news is bad
You have not much time left
I worry, I feel very sad
But yet, I still do not cry

As a kid, sorry to say
I'd cry at the drop of a hat
Really now, I hate to cry
I can only share what I feel
With strangers, rarely
I don't want to burden those
Closest to me

So, I wonder what your death will mean
Because I know that you are dying
And still I am not crying
I know it's about rationalizing
The inevitable end, so if I don't call
It's not because I think your dead

It's really because, I don't know
I don't want to know
Because I really know the answer
But not the time frame
And it's about control
And, maybe, not wanting to let go
Of the tears hiding behind my eyes

Sunrise minus 3.5 hours

It's almost 3 am EST and I've just finished up more organizing the house, cooking pork tenderloin for 40 people, and making sure all is ready for the big bash just 14.5 hour s from now. Seriously though, I promise to write more later. But first I wanted to share this great recipe from Ladies Home Journal, 1995....

Instructions

1. Heat oven to 475F. Mash garlic with 1/4 teaspoon salt, the pepper and
ginger to form a paste. Place pork in jelly-roll pan or large roasting
pan; rub all over with garlic mixture.
2. Toss sweet potatoes with 1 tablespoon oil and 3/4 teaspoon more salt in
large bowl. Arrange potatoes in jelly-roll pan with pork.
3. Combine brown sugar, vinegar, soy sauce and remaining 1 tablespoon oil
in small saucepan; brush some of the mixture over prok tenderloin. Roast
pork and potatoes 10 minutes.
4. Meanwhile bring remaining soy-sauce mixture to boil over high heat.
Boil until sauce is thickened, 5 minutes; emove from heat. 5. Brush half
the sauce over pork and turn sweet potatoes. Roast 5 minutes more until
sweet potatoes are tender and meat thermometer inserted in thickest part of
pork registers 155F.
6. Cut pork into 3/4" thick slices. Arrange on platter with sweet
potatoes. Pour any pan drippings and remaining sauce over pork. Sprinkle
sweet potatoes with parsley.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Contributor: Ladies' Home Journal - February, 1995

Preparation Time: 0:30

It's that smple, really. And oh so delicious. Now we didn't do the potatoes because we are catering (really this our first party in like ten years) the side dishes, including the potatoes from Whole Foods. Now if you never been to one, it's like the best grocery store outside of NYC that I've been too. (This is my favorite grocery store in the world) Very fresh items from the veggies to the fish and lots of healthy stuff too. There big on natural and organic foods. So, for the most part, even the meat is the healthiest you can get. okay, loosing my typing abilities, I think my fingers are leading the rest of me to sleep. Later.

Another Celebration

Before I get all wordy and opinionated, let me say Happy 11th Anniversary to my lovely wife who never reads my blog, or at least hasn't told me that she's read it. Thanks for eleven great years, two great kids and all the happiness in the world. (Audience goes ahhhh)

Now a few words on our dear Mr. President. It disturbs me, as I skip across the blogosphere, the number of people willing to support Bush based on one issue, security and that issue only. And now, he's done one of the lowest political moves I've ever seen. In the face of civil disobedience in San Francisco, faced with increasing pressure from the religious right and neo-conservative members of the Republican party, the President, as we are all now aware, proposed a constitutional amendment to deny the civil rights of gays and lesbians to marry. Trust me, this has nothing to do with the sanctity of marriage and everything to do with those votes from the far right.

Now, back to those bloggers who I've seen throw their weight behind the President based on just security, saying that Kerry would not be able to defend our country adequately and that he waffles. Well, can we truly trust a man who may have mislead us into the war wtih Iraq? Should we continue to turn to a presiident who's lost more jobs than any other president in the past decade, a president who's fighting the war on terror with little to show but lost American lives. Sure, we beat Saddam but what did we gain? No WMD, no proof of any on-going chemical programs and daliy attacks on American soldiers. Isn't it funny that the Administration decided that we shouldn't see the coffins coming home to Dover Air Force base. And why hasn't anyone criticized that PR move in an election year? Moreover, can we trust an administration who's top leaders suppor the following view of the state of the world? If you're not scared now, another four years are certain to put our country in a position that I don't think I want to see.

That's my political spin for the night (which is now, technically, morning). We are quite busy getting ready for the big bash on Saturday. Tomorrow night will be spent cooking the pork tenderloin. But now, it's time to get some sleep. Peace. Shalom.

Fascinating Discussions Through the Veil of Exhaustion

It's been another week of very little sleep, slammed at work and well, just running fumes. Here are some brief items that have caused me pause so far this week.

On my birthday, Palestinian suicide bomber blows up a bus in Jerusalem, killing civilians including children
Dubya, bowing to the conservative,religious right, asks for a constitutional amendment outlawing same-sex marriage

Oh, sorry, I can't reallly write anymore. I can barely lift my fingers to type. Must get some sleep. I'll try to write more tomorrow. I have a lot to say.

Happy B-Day to Me

Okay, it's my birthday. Well, at least for twenty-six more minutes. Had to write something today.

And who would you be?

Found this quiz on my friend Kristine's knitting blog, which is a great site if you love knitting. For me, it's just a way to keep pace with her busy life.

You are Schroeder!


Which Peanuts Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Have added a new link today, BittyBoo, aka Karen!, a very proud parent and a person with one of the greatest names in the world. Check out her site and leave her a nice note about her beautiful kids.

Short today, busy with the kids and Liam's up from his nap. Peace. Shalom.

Where is my mind?

This has been a useless week for me. I'm not sure what it is, but I am not motivated, I feel like I'm getting nothing done, or at most I'm struggling to start projects I should be finishing. And I can't seem to shake it off. Now, I usually don't go public with these feelings, but I figure if I share, maybe someone (if there is anyone) might have some positive suggestions.

I'm too old for a pity party and don't really want one. And I sense that I'm struggling with either too many choices or not enough human interaction beyond e-mail or phone calls. All my co-workers are in NY (Long story, but I'm the last person of our original marketing team in B'more. And the group I work for now are all in NY...didn't move because they didn't ask and probably wouldn't pay me what I want to live there) and while I have a lovely view of the Harbor, a great collection of ITunes, the silence can sometimes be overwhelming.

I also know that I started 'feeling' this way after my sister's report of their visit with Dad, the chemo is working but he's also losing weight and as expected, losing hair. I think I had half convinced myself that he'd live through this but their report brought home that fact that he is dying and it's only a question of when. And, being the strangely ;absent-minded control freak I am, not knowing when, not having any damn control really pisses me off.

Ok, I'm done for now. Thanks to ispy for the inspiration to get this rant out on virtual paper.

The Insenstive Male (aka The Big Jerk)

Hey Coach, if she was such a bad player, how the hell did she make the team as a walk-on?

Drop Dead Exhausted

The worse thing to be with two little kids is exhausted and alone. But that's where I find myself tonight. Karen is on another trek to Lowe's on the new saga known as the Shutter Fiasco. I've gotten about seven hours max sleep in the last forty-eight and I'm just about to drop. But of course, I can't until I get the kids to bed. And this would the kind of night where I fall asleep while reading the bedtime story. Let's hope not. I still have to move some furniture out of the office which is going to be painted this weekend. I promise more substance after I get some sleep.

x

Bath Time

Well, it's me and the two most wonderful kids I know. And it's bath time, so I will really have to write later. But let me tell you that bath time involves not just the ritual face washing, head washing, hands, etc...but real rubber ducks, splashing, yelling, singing and of course, the coup de grace, the brushing of the teeth. Happy Memories my friends, happy memories.

A-Rod A-Rod A-Rod

I'm still totally in shcck about the deal of the century. I mean what a dagger to the heart of the Red Sox Nation. They must be crying in the Harbor right now. This is so cool. Yeah, I'll miss seeing Alfonso Soriano play for the Yankees, but A-Rod in Pinstripes, it's like a gift from the baseball G-ds.

Valentine's Day 2004

Chocolate was out this year but I did get Karen a nice bouquet of flowers and a card. It was a pretty hectic day as uaual. I took Izzy to gymnastics this morning and then the two of us hungout at Starbucks in Mt. Washington (a little village in the north part of the city). Needless to say, I'm so hung over from last night that everytime I sat down someplace quiet, I fell asleep. Go ahead, laugh. I deserve the pain and suffering but last night was so worth it. Terrance Simien rocked and we all had a great time.

So, while I continue to be drowsy, I look forward more and more to the end of April, when we will take to the road sans kids, and attend the first weekend of JazzFest. Can't wait.

A new link

Before we go out, K hasn't even showered yet, the sitter is here and I'm about to crash...but I know, in my heart I know, that once I step out into the cold air I'll get my second wind. It's just that this damn sofa is so comfortable. I digress.

When you have the time, or if you are looking to procrastinate on what you are supposed to be doing, stop by here the happy and always fun to read blog of Todd and Heather.

By the way, after being together for almost eleven years, Valentine's Day is well, just as it was when we first met. I still haven't bought her a card, nor the kids, but will do so in the morning after I take Izzy to gymnastics. At least, and this is my rationalization, that I didn't forget it was Valentine's Day. And all you young, childless couples take advantage of this being on a Saturday. Good night. Shalom.

Friday Night_A Date

Well, I'm sitting here on the sofa, hanging out with the kids. Part of me could go straight to sleep but can't do that. K is taking a short nap and we are heading out around 8 for our night out. First we are going over to our friend's Kelly and Craig's house for drinkis with them and another couple and then we are all going to the Funkbox to see Terrance Simien. It will be a fun night and the music should be great. Defintely gets my mind wandering ahead to JazzFest. Just ten weeks or so until we leave.

Well, gotta go play with the kids. Maybe I can get a small nap playing like I'm sleeping and letting them jump on me. I don't know why, but little kids love jumping on people. Oh well, a Happy Valentine's Day to all. Peace. Shalom.

1999 from the album 1999

1999 from the album 1999 by Prince

Wrote my first ever angry comment today on someone else's blog. See under the item from yesterday concerning etiquette, if you so desire.

I'm sitting in my new writing spot, in our first floor office, in my late grandfather's chair and struggling a bit with whatever the hell it is I want to share. Okay, let's do this. I'll show you some design work. That will take care of the 'images' part of the site for this post.....here we go

Love it, hate it? Whatever. Just enjoy the moment. Seriously though, I'm really suffering from a serious block tonight. Really can't think of what to write about and too tired for much detail. So, at that, I'm just signing off. I have an inspired idea, thank you to a certain Chica that I should write more about design. And I'm going to think about it. It is what I know, or at least what I think I know. Time will tell. Certainly I have strong opiions to share, just ask my friends from International Paper who got to hear me rant last night at dinner after a truly wonderful event that was held here in town by our local chapter of AIGA (American Institute of Graphic Artists). I'm on the board. Okay, that's it. Really. Outta here. Peace. Shalom.

No Time

Obstacle 1 from the album Turn On The Bright Lights by Interpol

Been a few days since last posting and really no time right now other than my desire to procrastinate just a little. Anyhow, major project to do today and very busy this week, at work and home. So, there's nothing much to say for now. Promise more informative writing to come soon.

A Must Read on the Middle East

Shocking for me to recommend an article from the Heritage Foundation or anything remotely associated with them. But, this is a must read. A true state of the state of the Middle East. Did I say that you should really read this article by Dennis Prager. I've never read anything of his before but this you have to read. Have I made my point? Is there anyone out there to read it?

Link happy when it's important.

In O'Hare (that's Chicago for those who've never flown)

The Golden Age from the album Sea Change by Beck

Here I sit on the floor, next to the nearest power outlet in the airport. Note to the people who run this monolith known as O'Hare, you need more outlets and Wi-Fi. Have spent the last two days here on business. Spent yesterrday in meetings and today touring print vendors who had survived our Commercial Print RFP process. The weather here has been fine. A little snow, not too cold. Much better than last week when they had -4 degree weather with -25 degree wind chill. Have had too much food and am now just waiting on the plane home. Which of course is delayed a bit, not because of weather but due to equipment problems. So, I'm sitting here trying to get my mind going, writing, and allowing my battery to get its power back up.

It's 6 pm Central Time. That's 7 o'clock back home. The kids didn't have school today because of an ice storm that didn't happen. Just a day of heavy rain, temps near 40 degrees. Of course tomorrow it's supposed to drorp to 27 degrees in the morning and that means ice problems and most likely, knowing the Baltimore mentality, a two-hour delay.

You can tell how much we talked about the possibility of bad weather over the last forty-eight hours. Really, besides the meetings which were basically some bridge repair/building, shared gripe session, supporting a friend in need (she very recently lost her husband) and meeting some new faces. Have gotten some positive feedback on the design I developed for my birthday invite. Funny, it's something I would have normally procrastinated on until the point of going out and having to buy something instead, but this time I actually got it done.

Wow, seeing little kids in the airport, makes me miss my kids and Karen even more. Sometimes these little trips are a good get-away but in truth, I prefer the one day, up and back, trips. I don't miss the kids and Karen as much, get my chance to do a little something for myself and still sleep in my own bed. But you know, there really isn't much pleasure to business travel. Your're stuck in meetings, you are trying to finish project for clients or get things to a printer, you have to FTP files (once you find a place that you can FTP from), and then there's the social component. You have to be an active participant in business dinner conversation, and how do I the 'plant' appear to my friends and co-workers. How is my lack of sparkingly, witty conversation perceived? These are the things that drive me nuts.

Speaking of FTP, those of you who work with comptuers will appreciate this story. At my hotel in Chicago they had T1 lines and Ethernet cables in the rooms. I plugged in my Mac and got an IP address but no connection to the hotel's ISP's server. I called the front desk, who sent me to their Internet tech support and I spent about an hour on the phone trying various tricks of the trade to get in their server. All to no avail. I even walked down to the business center and tried their Ethernet line and no luck. The problem was I had to download some images from a stock vendor to place in a brochure that needed to be at the printer (FTP) by today. I was stuck. No hotel Wi-Fi, no Internet cafe nearby, it was almost 11:30 PM (this was an 1.5 hour ordeal) and I returned to my room feeling defeated. Then the idea struck me, I would war-drive from my hotel window. It was the best idea I'd had all day. I found not one but two Wi-Fi networks with a strong enough signal. One was password protected but the other was not. By 1 am I had downloaded and placed all the image files that I needed. The final step, FTP'ing everything to Baltimore, didn't go as well, the connection kept stalling, but I did mange to send everything from using a T1 line at one of the printers we visited. (Sorry this was so wordy, I just thought it was a great Wi-Fi tale.)

It's now 2:15 am and I got home around 11:30 pm EST. So, why am I still awake????